Finding joy in the everyday

Who am I? I am a wife. I am a mother. I am a daughter. I am a sister. I am an aunt. I am a niece. I am a cousin. I am a friend. I am many many things Each one of these titles add up to make a whole - they are who I am as a person.  I am not just "me" (whatever that might mean), I am far more than just that. We are the product of all our roles and it is these many roles that shape each one of us and makes us all different. We are women of many hats. We wear many different hats as women. Each hat requires something different from us and impacts how we interact in our world with other people. Each has its own set of expectations and obligations. Each represents a piece of our divided self, with our many identities, which is often sliced up neatly like a Thanksgiving pie. We may be friend, daughter, girlfriend, sister, mother, wife, grandmother, counselor, career woman, pastor’s wife, student, coach, homemaker. With the endless ...

As a child I thought our family were very good Christians, far better than most. Why? Because we don't own a TV, I always wore skirts or dresses, hat on Sundays, we read the Bible daily and we sung hymns around the piano in the evening, never swore, never went to the movies, didn't drink alcohol, didn't listen to modern music and unlike all my friends I wasn't allowed to cut my hair short, wear ear-rings or go to parties. To a young child, these all " ticked the boxes " that made for a "good" Christian family. But ticking the boxes does not make for a good Christian. These can and sometime be just appearances. It is how we behave and what is in our hearts everyday that counts.  I see this, perhaps not intentionally in Blogland.  I am a stay-at-home-mum (tick), I home school (tick), I only wear skirts (tick), we don't own a TV (tick), we only read good books (tick), we read the bible daily (tick), I have lots of children wi...

In Australia, 58.8% of women are participating in the labour force (those women working or looking for work) compared to 71.5% for males. Of those women working, almost 55% are part-time and 54% are full-time.  Most men work full-time. One of the most popular topics that I find when reading blogs is the number of articles on feminism.   I have been wanting to comment on this because it puzzles me quite a bit. Most ordinary women who go about their daily business, including those going off to work don’t talk about feminism or even think about much.  It's just not on their radar anymore. Many young women no longer see it as relevant — however they still believe in things like equal pay, but they don’t see this as a feminist issue, just common sense.  The worry among the feminist movement is that it isn’t much of movement anymore and its certainly lost its power. It was only when I started reading blogs did I come across the word so much and so o...

On Tuesday I read an interesting article in the Sydney Morning Herald regarding a single mum of two  teenage children and how she was able to budget on her Centrelink (welfare) payment - in particular feed her family on $120 ($119 US) per fortnight.   The story was about how it was possible to make healthy meals from scratch on a very tight budget.  These recipes she has placed on her blog .   The reason for writing this is not about living on a budget, it is about the comments she received (which you can find at the bottom of the newspaper article, all 202) that were both scathing and vicious.  Why, because she left her paid employment (as a clerk) which she "hated", then couldn't find any other employment and had no choice but to remain at home and receive unemployment benefits.  Many of those who commented used words such as "leeching off the public purse" and "bludging".  It appears from the comments that there is a very negative attit...

What makes a gentleman?  Do they exist anymore?  Did feminism kill the gentleman? Do women still like having a man open a door for them?  Is chivalry dead? I must admit I still like men opening doors for me, showing respect, curbing their language when I am around and dashing to my aid when in need?  In today’s feminist world this is all a little old-fashion and I can see many women frowning at me for saying this.  My dad is a gentleman and he is my gauge of how I expect men to behave and the way I have tried to bring up my sons.  However my sons have said to me that when they hold doors open for women they find that some women are downright rude to them.  So they stop doing it because of the comments they receive.   It’s a sad world. According to the Webster’s Dictionary a gentleman is defined as: "A polite, gracious or considerate man with high standards of propriety or correct behaviour ". Below are attributes that I think makes a ge...

I was reading an article by the Australian Institute of Family Studies on how teenagers use their time, in particular on household chores and came across this line in the conclusion “ Increasing gender equality among 15-19 year olds living with their parents was manifested in girls becoming more “ domestically useless ”, like their brothers, rather than in boys doing more. Daughters are becoming more like sons, rather than retaining an intermediate status as “useful house children ”.  The report indicates that teenage girls’ refusal to help with the housework is being driven by a feminist revolt.  They think: “ Why should I bother to do the dishes when my brother doesn’t ?” To me this should raise major concerns — what happens when these teenagers grow up, leave home and start their own families — are we going to see filthy toilets, rubbish piling up and dirty kitchens in the Gen Z households.  Will they have enough skills to run a home, care for their child...

When my sons were little they loved watching Thomas the Tank Engine on DVD, we watch it for enjoyment.  I, nor my sons, cared about the number of male characters to female characters, however, as we know, it worried the feminist movement who complained about the lack of female characters and that most were relegated to secondary roles. (only eight of the 49 main characters in the current Thomas shows are female). Toy Story 3 was last week, a children’s movie that my 22 year old son went to see and one which he thoroughly enjoyed.  However I wonder if he noticed the ratio of male to females characters, no he didn’t.  In case you haven’t either, there is a ratio of seven males to one female.  O dear.   It also contains a “ nagging ” mother (getting cross at her 17 year old son) and a " hyper - feminine " and " overly emotional " Barbie.  Yes, you have guessed it, feminists are complaining that the family film is sexist or to be more correct “careless se...

Following on from my brief study of Feminism — After achieving many reforms to protected women, the movement developed a more radical viewpoint that began attacking the very foundations of who and what women were.  This was clearly evident in a 1966 statement made by the National Organisation of Women (the biggest feminist movement in the USA) saying ” it is to take action to bring women into full participation in the mainstream of American society now, exercising all privileges and responsibilities thereof in truly equal partnership with men ."  They wanted women to have everything that men had. Writers such as Simone de Beauvoir (author of “The Second Sex”), Betty Friedan (author of “The Feminine Mystique”) and Germaine Greer (author of “The Female Eunuch”) argued that men wanted to maintain the power positions they had in society as it controlled, enslavement and oppressed women.  Women were “trapped” in the private sphere of the home whilst men were in the public sph...

Many bloggers have expressed strong views regarding feminism and I can understand why. So I thought I would look briefly (and I mean brief) at the movement and see if it achieve anything positive.  Yes, another “HOT” topic! Like all movements, the feminist movement has many different factions, some very radical others quite conservative.  Often the more radical views are stronger and more disturbing and that is what we remember most and any good that may have been achieved is long forgotten.  When hearing the word “feminism” we think — the destruction of the family, anti-marriage, gay-rights, anti-Christianity, anti-femininity,  wanting it all, total control.  And quite right, these are the views of some factions of the feminist movement, but not all. 
 The Match-girl union So briefly, what was achieved (it is important to note that it was not only the early feminists pushing for reforms, there were those in government [such as the conservative Robert Pee...

As I wore pink today I was very interested in this story in the newspaper (on-line) about the "problems" of young girls wearing pink. There is a group in the UK called Pinkstinks who are calling for: " parents to boycott manufacturers of pink toys and children's clothing on the basis that "pinkification" is herding young girls into "pink alleys" that lead inexorably toward the pink collar career ghetto. The group's website asserts that long-term exposure to pink leads to low self-esteem, poor body image and limited opportunities for girls and women. The campaign "aims to challenge the culture of pink " What can I say - I must have low self-esteem, poor body image and limited opportunities as I love wearing pink!! Their aims is to: Inspire, motivate and enthuse girls about the possibilities and opportunities open to them Improve girls’ self esteem and confidence, raise their ambitions and ultimately improve their life chance...