There is so much anger about these days, people die due to angry outbursts.  People get angry over the most trivial things, no longer wanting to listen or understand, but ready to lash out and hurt. It often starts at a young age, just walk through a school yard. When angry, the words coming from a persons mouth can be malicious, slanderous and abusive with only one purpose - to hurt without any thought of the other persons feelings. 

There are many examples given in the Bible in regards to anger.  But equally, there are many verses on how to avoid anger.  My favourite verse would have to be " So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath" from James 1:19.  Sadly (and I fall into this trap too) we are often far too quick to open our mouths and far to slow to listen.  The results can be devastating.

Thanks to "The Excellent Wife" by Martha Peace, below is two lists, biblical contrasts between the man (or woman) who stirs up anger and the man (or woman) who subdues anger.

Stirs up Anger

A harsh word stirs up anger (Prov 15:1)

A wrathful man stirs up strife (Prov 15:18)

 Wrath is cruel and anger a torrent (Prov 27:4)
Make no friendship with an angry man, And with a furious man do not go (Prov 22:24)

For as the churning of milk produces butter, And wringing the nose produces blood,So the forcing of wrath produces strife. (Prov 30:33)
Anger rests in the bosom of fools. (Ecc 7:9)

 The mouth of fools pours forth foolishness (Prov 15:2)

idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. (Galatians 5:20-21)

 Subdues Anger

A soft answer turns away wrath (Prov 15:1) 

But he who is slow to anger allays contention (Prov 15:18)

A gift in secret pacifies anger (Prov 21:14) 

But he who restrains his lips is wise. (Prov 10:19)

  Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God. (Matt 5:9)

He who is slow to wrath has great understanding (Prov 14:29)

The heart of the righteous studies how to answer (Prov 15:28) 

As a wife, our words should be gentle and soft, compassionate, kind, humble and most of all loving instead of harsh and angry - no matter how we are spoken to.  A tough one at times. But through prayer and asking God to change our hearts and our character, we can throw away the "angry wife" and become the wife that . . .  ponders how to answer (Prov 15:28).

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  1. This is so true. And I think it has become worse in these time when time seems to be so short for anything and everything - life is such a rush, and this is seen in conversation too - we rush ahead with the first thing that comes to our mouths/heads. :( Sadly.

    This is very wise advice Jo - thank you for the reminder. :)

  2. I have read that book, it's great, isn't it? And we sell it in our bookshop! =)

  3. Thanks, words I needed to hear before meeting with an angry soul tomorrow.

  4. Good reminder Jo, thanks! We studied that book some years ago with some women from our church, it was very good!

  5. This spoke to my heart Jo. Thank you for sharing.

    God bless you :)

  6. Thanks for sharing those timely thoughts and verses Jo.

  7. An excellent post Jo! When I do my rounds for the Real Estate, I often hear such anger and abuse spilling forth from the mouths of properties neighbours... and it's mostly aimed at the children! No one seems to even care that the whole street can hear them.

    You have provided excellent scriptures to meditate on... and the books sounds great too. I haven't heard of it before.

    Good reminder for us all!

  8. It's a great book Amanda - full of wonderful advice. The author tells it as it is, straight from the scriptures. Sometimes I hear the way parents talk to their children makes me feel sick. It is so sad. I have heard that children treated this way, often do it to their own children as they know no other way of dealing with problems.

  9. Hey Jo, yes, I have fallen into the trap of opening my mouth too soon. My anger over the years have been about injustice situations or when someone is just not listening to me! The Lord has and continues to teach me about not opening my mouth or walking away and then speaking at the right time in the right tone. Big lessons but all possible with the Holy Spirit. Great post! xxx

  10. Jo,
    I love The Excellent Wife! Martha Peace speaks the truth (and it is hard to read sometimes, :)) in love. It's my favorite book on being a godly wife. I'm still learning painful lessons about thinking before I speak, and I'm praying my children will be so much more sanctified in this area than I am.

  11. I read this book, "The Excellent Wife" several years ago. It was quite informative as well as an excellent read.

    Also, thank you for the reminder in regards to controlling an angry tongue. I shamefully admit that I need much practice in this area from time to time.


    -Lady Rose

  12. Lady Rose/Trisha - I have only recently bought "The Excellent Wife" and have really enjoyed reading it - as you say, very informative and I particular like the way the author has set out each chapter and the lists of comparisons —make is very easy to read, but can be challenging at times.

    I think we all suffer from bouts of anger and it can be quite a struggle, especially when others around you get angry.

  13. Anger in a family is self perpetuating. Parents yell and scream, and the kids learn that this is how to deal with a problem, so they yell and scream. When I am gardening out the street side, people down the road will inevitably have a screaming match, bad in itself, but the language makes it extra bad. I have found that it takes extraordinary effort to change an angry attitude, and sadly still loose it myself at times. A life of prayer and constant communion with God is about the best stopper of this, especially when frustrated.


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