Dumping rocks - learning to say NO

None of us like to say no when asked to do something, even if it means our load has become more difficult and heavier than we can manage. Women are the first to put up their hands to offer help - we want to be seen as helpful, part of the team, willing to be charitable and not wanting of offend anyone. 

However, if you read yesterdays story "The overloaded wagon" by Rosemarie Kowalski you will realise that often we overload our plates with things that have nothing to do with God's plan - we are simply trying to impress God and everyone else.

Aren't women meant to be busy and kind and helpful?

He doesn't want us to do EVERYTHING - in fact, as we have so often discovered, by doing everything means we become like Martha - exhausted, stressed, worn out and unable to sit and enjoy the company of those we love and more importantly - not spending enough time with Christ our saviour. 

So how do you start "dumping rocks" to lighten our load and only do those things that are important. 

The following suggestions are from Joanna Weaver's book "Having a Mary heart in a Martha World":

  • Invite God to rule and reign over your life: each morning before you get out of bed, present your day to Him and asked Him to provide wisdom and guidances. 
  • Ask God to reveal the next step: as you go through your day, ask the Lord "What do I do next", don't let the big picture overwhelm you - one step at the time.  There is no need to run about multi-tasking, just do one thing at the time. 
  • Have faith that what needs to get done will get done: Having dedicated your day to the Lord, don't try and take over and do your "to-do-list" and not His. Do what you can do in the time allocated and trust that what wasn't accomplished was either unnecessary or being taken care of by God. 
  • Be open to the Spirit's leading: You may find your day interrupted by divine appointments. Instead of resisting the interruptions, flow with the one thing as God brings it across your path. 


 (Proverbs 16:3)

Don't start the day with a huge to-do-list. Be practical in your ambitions, you are not trying to conquer Mount Everest in a day. Just because some one else spends all day cleaning their house (everyday) doesn't mean you have to - perhaps they have it all wrong.

What is God's desire for you? If you are so busy running about, you are unlikely to hear God speak to you. Or - if you are so busy doing your own pleasurable activities, likewise you won't hear God either. 

Just because we are women - mothers and wives - doesn't mean we have to carry EVERY LOAD. Being a caring and nurturing person doesn't mean you can't say no. Your job is only to carry the load that God has asked you to carry and not everyone else load too.

And don't check out someone else load to see if they are carrying more or less than you - if they are carrying more, it is God's decision and not yours or perhaps they haven't yet learnt to "dump stones".

BUT most importantly, the most critical load we are all carrying, is one about paying attention to God through pray, reading His word, mediating on His wisdom, to worship Him - sadly, this is often the one thing we tip off our load as its slowing us down. This is our devotion and not duty. 

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

(Matthew 11:28)



  1. This makes sense. It's more about balancing out our commitments to begin with, and getting our priorities straight. There is nothing wrong with helping others, but it has to be in balance with our own priorities before God. Some people seem to manage everything, others seem to manage very little - what matters to us?? ONLY our own accountability before God. We can't answer to Him for everyone else! We can only answer for ourselves. :)
    It's good to keep busy, but it's also good to be practical and realistic... and most important, to make sure we spend time with God frequently - that's not what we squeeze into our day. We spend time with God and then squeeze all the OTHER activities into our day ;)

  2. Excellent, thanks for sharing at Good Morning Mondays. Blessings

  3. It's always interesting how the things we think are essential and important.... are most likely not of eternal significance.

    Thanks for sharing at #SmallVictoriesSundayLinkup ...I've pinned your post!

    1. Couldn't agree more - some think the more they pile on the more Christian they look when it is often far from the truth.

  4. I could say a lot about this, but right now I'm just not up to it. I'm in a low time when exhaustion is keeping me from a lot. Funny, isn't that? Anyway, I'll just say "thank you!" for this good reminder. "...his yoke is easy, and his burden is light."


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