Young mums

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"Most women - 59 per cent - think 29 is the best age to start a family, a survey has found. Women are waiting four years longer to give birth than in 1985. The research found many women felt they were best placed to procreate at 29 as they were secure both financially and in their relationships."(see full story

I was 21 when my first son was born and I loved being a young mum.  I had heaps of energy, could crawl all over the floor and now he is in his 20's I still feel young (and perhaps be a young granny on day)!! However, the downside was we had less money and whilst my friends were traveling overseas, I was at home caring for my bub. But, would I have change it . . . no, my son was far more precious than an overseas trip and I can still travel (God willing) as my children have now grown up.   I do have an older husband, so for us, it was important to factor in his age. 

Australian Institute of Family Studies research has found many parents wished they had started even younger after having their first child. "Many said they didn't know how fantastic it would be until they had their first child," assistant director of research Ruth Weston said.

I was my mothers last child and born when she was in her mid 30's, so by the time I was a teenagers she was "getting old" - so I thought - and didn't understand teenagers!  I sometimes wished I had a younger mother like all my friends.  Their mums were trendy, mine wasn't - funny how a child see their mother at times! 

Is there a perfect time?


  1. There is no universal perfect time, I think. It is different for everyone, and naturally - we will always wish we could change this or that, but if we have been continually committing our ways to the Lord, it is perfect just for us!
    P.S. Do hope that back is better soon, and that lifting Sarah didn't make it worse. Also hope you didn't get sicker than sneezing, Sarah is irritable, and has a runny nose and cough - ugh! 2 colds in 2 months is a bit much, but I wouldn't have missed your visit for a healthier Sarah! =)

  2. I was 35 when we added our first child to our family. I would have started eariler, but after years of infertility we were finally blessed through adoption. My second child came when I was 36. Now that I am 39 (yikes) we are in the processing of adopting again. Do I wish I had started younger? Yes. But only because maybe then I could have a larger family. The nice thing about waiting was that we were more financially secure and I have been able to stay home with the babies. I also think I am just way more mature and more patient than I was in my 20s. Funny though, my Mom was 34 when I was born. And I always wished she was younger like the other Moms. I hope my kids don't feel the same way. At least all of their friends have Mom's the same age (or close to it) as me.

  3. We have struggled with infertility, so I have to admit that I would see anytime God blesses us with children as perfect for us. Even without children, though, I have to say that I feel blessed by all the opportunities God has brought to us to serve and to be part of wonderful communities.

  4. You must have been married very young. For some marriage does not happen until they are much older. There is, in these cases, no opportunity to have children any younger, even if the woman desires it.

  5. I married young at 18 and had our first child at 21. Waited 6 yrs to have another because hubby didn't want anymore. Sad we didn't talk about this before marriage. I wanted a large family and assumed he did too. I do have two wonderful kids and two great grandkids with a third on the way.
    Still, I wished I had more kids.

  6. Bonnie, I don't think modern children think their mothers are as old as the previous generation as it is quite common to see older mums about. But when I was growing up most mothers were a lot younger so mine was unusal. It is funny how children view their parents!! I am just thankful that I have a mum now - and that my children have grandparents.

  7. Bets - sorry to hear about Sarah's cold - I just got a snuffly nose and nothing else. Very mild, not even a sore throat. No my back does this froom time to time, i think it was the 14KG bag!! It is on the mend and much better.

    Of course there is no perfect time - and what is good for one isn't for someone else. But it does amuse me when I read articles that provide the "perfect age".

  8. I was 35 when we had our dd: we had years of not being able to conceive and being told I had issues only to miraculously have her now! In the meantime we travelled and served God and had fun together and in my case I feel I'm not missing out on anything much because of having had all that time and travel with my dh before we had her. I also feel I'm more mature now and probably would have made more mistakes raising her had I had her when I was younger. The downside though is that yes I don't have as much energy as I did in my 20's lol!

  9. and I hope she doesn't grow up thinking I'm too old or old fashioned when she's a teenager:)

  10. Joyfulmum - I am sure Rebekah won't think you are old-fashion, you seem to have so much fun together. And times have changed since I was a kid.

  11. It is of course different for everyone, but I agree with you on the point you made here, Jo - which is that a lot of women these days CHOOSE to have their children when they are older. I don't necessarily think it is a healthy or truly necessary decision for them as a lot of the time they hold off on having children for selfish or greedy reasons (eg. they want to "live" or have a "career" or travel before having children, or they don't want the inconvenience etc).

    Of course there are those of us who get married later or can't have children immediately because of infertility etc - that pretty much goes without saying.

  12. Hello there, just found your blog and it looks lovely. Interesting that you should post on this as its something Ive been thinking about a lot lately. I married early, at 22, but for variuos reaons beyond my control, I am just now a mother at 31 (my baby girl is 14 months).

    For years I longed to have children, and I think that young motherhood can be awesome for the very reasons you mentioned above, but at the same time I know the Lord is sovereign and for me, this is the right timing. Im not as young or as energetic as I was at 22 (though Im trying to get back in shape so i can be!) but I know i have more wisdom as Ive grown in my faith in Jesus (I only became a Christian at 21) and that my trial of wanting babies for years but unable to have them drew me closer to my Lord. So, each person has their journey and if we trust the Lord, he will be good to give us what we need, when we need it.

    But what I find funny i that so many of my friends and family, including Christians, who have teenagers, say they want their kids to go to college, start a career, and wait untilt they are closer to 30 to have children. I can't count myself amont this number. if this is where the Lord should lead our daughter, then great, but if she is mature enough at 21 and meets a young man who can provide for a family and loves Jesus as much as I pray she will at that age, then I will bless the union and hope to be a helpful grandma! thanks for sharing your story. :)


  13. I had my last child when I was 31. I CHOSE to stop having children and I regret that decision every day. Unfortunately, it was a decision I could not reverse. I never really compared my mom's age to other moms. I was like everyone else in that she was not often around (divorced, therefore constantly at work to support) I have noticed that my friends with several children (as in more than five) seem to look much younger than me or my other friends of the same age with fewer or no children. I guess children keep you young ~ though I'm sure there are those who would argue that. LOL.

    Hope you are well, Jo, and that you are feeling better. Have you heard of the product Body Balance? I know they sell it in Australia, wonder if you have heard of it? It has helped me immensely with my back. I suffered from back pain my whole life it seems. One day, after many months of taking the supplement daily (just for nutritions sake, not healing) I noticed my back didn't hurt anymore. It was gradual, but the pain has never returned. Just FYI.


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