Beware the gorgeous guy on TV

Richard Geer from the movie An Officer and a Gentleman

Often when women discuss a movie they have watched they will talk about how gorgeous (or cute) one of the characters was. I've done this, more than once, many times if I am honest.  The character in most occasions is some handsome male actor.  I can remember watching the Lord of the Rings Trilogy and telling others how handsome Aragon was in the films. I don't think there are many women who have not done this at some point. Most of us are flawed human beings that have minds that wander where they shouldn't. 

We generally associate men with perving at women. However women "perv" too, just in a different manner. When men perv, it is out there in the open, everyone can tell, however when women do this it is perhaps more hidden eg comments made whilst watching a movie or talking to a friend at work about a male colleague.  When women are perving at men it isn't quite in the same sexual vein that men do, but we still look at men and fantasize about that "gorgeous hunk" and we shouldn't be.  It doesn't matter if you are a stay-at-home mum or like me and go off to work (we are all vulnerable), if our minds wander when we are watching or reading something and we start to think about how "gorgeous" someone is (who isn't our husband) then we aren't behaving in a Christian manner.   Our minds are not being kept pure.  Just as we don't like our husbands looking at other women, they don't like us looking at men (even if they are on TV or in a book) and fantasizing about their looks.

If unsure about what you are watching, reading or evening thinking -- remember Philippians 4:8 and tick the boxes -- is it pure, lovely, noble or good, if not, then it probably isn't any good.  A good test is whether we could honestly say we could read from a novel out loud to Jesus and feel comfortable in doing so. Many of us would say no.

The only gorgeous hunk in your life should be your husband, not the actor on TV or the man in a novel (who isn't even real). If you can't watch or read these without your mind wandering, them leave them alone.  And worse still, don't try and compare your husband to these made up characters - my husband likes to remind me he will never be a Mr Darcy!!


Link to Mummy Porn article


Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things. 

Philippians 4:8



Comments

  1. So true, Jo. I have often wondered about these women who say they would want to 'sleep' with this or that actor; I think it's just disgusting. Often when I see an actor/actress kissing etc, or hear someone talking about wanting (any kind of) a relationship with the actors/actresses, I think about the fact that those people on the TV are usually extremely immoral and have had many many many relationships. You have to wonder how many diseases they spread! That on its own is enough to put me off thinking even the slightest romantic feeling or notions about any of them!!!!
    I am VERY happy loving my husband - thinking about him, loving him, putting my all into being the best wife I can is plenty enough for me!!!

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    1. You should ask your dear husband what he thinks of women who do this - I would love to hear a male view! My husband says they are all very silly.

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    2. He thinks it is incredibly superficial and unrealistic for women to talk in that way - and in a Biblical light, it is a vain imagination of their lustful flesh.

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    3. Wise words - good to hear his view, say thanks for commenting. I hope you are both enjoying your weekend:)

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  2. ah Jo so very very true, I say a loud amen to that and most of all, let the Word of God be our weights and balance in all we do in life Shaz in oz.x

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    1. Thanks for dropping by - hope you are having a lovely weekend.

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  3. How right you are! This is so easy a trap to fall into! May our thoughts focus on Christ and things that are noble, true and right! :)

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    1. Why do we find this so hard - Satan is so clever in conning us.

      Thanks for dropping by:)

      Blessings

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  4. Beautiful post and great reminder. It's often the little things that draw us deeper than we need to go, because we're not diligent in our 'things to think on". Love that verse! Thanks for sharing.

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    1. Thanks for dropping by:) - I also love that verse, it is packed with so much and the message is so clear, however so many of us (me included) skip over it when we are doing things we shouldn't be.

      Blessings

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  5. Thank you for addressing this very serious issue. I have had women say things to me that were embarrassing to listen to, and there are movies that I refuse to watch simply because of the temptation that they put me in. Sometimes they may not be necessarily "bad" films, but I feel unfaithful to my husband because of the way I respond to someone in them. If we truly desire not to be led into temptation we need to take a different route when we have the opportunity.

    Proverbs 4:26-27 Ponder the path of thy feet, and let all thy ways be established. Turn not to the right hand nor to the left: remove thy foot from evil.

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    1. I hear it all the time and it wasn't until the other day when I was writing "Mummy Porn" I wondered how different this really was. Here are grown women fantasizing about men they don't even know about thoughts they shouldn't even be thinking.

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    2. Jo, I agree. And, even more I'm appalled when I hear a Christian woman (perhaps an older one) talking about how "good looking" some younger man in her own local church is. It hurts my heart to hear such things. I wonder that they have no conscience before the Lord to realize what they are saying. And, in some cases it's hard for a younger woman to feel comfortable in speaking up to rebuke that, or even in knowing exactly what to say. I can only conclude that they have inhaled the world so much that they think it is fine and normal for a woman to vocally admire some younger man's "good looks" (and this all regardless of either party's married status). :-(

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  6. Thank you for linking up to Feminine Friday! I hope you'll come back by and share with us again this Friday! http://susangodfrey.com/category/faith/feminine-friday/

    Blessings!
    Susan Godfrey

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    1. Most certainly - and thankyou for the invitation:)

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  7. Excellent advice! My marriage improved greatly when i ditched all unrealistic I had placed on my husband and made a mindful effort to STOP looking at other men, even on the screen. The verses in Philippians 4 were a great help to me and after many years of putting them into practice I can tell you I don't have to just stay quiet about what I am thinking, I really just don't think of other men that way anymore! God is so good and will truly guard our hearts and minds if we just let him. Thanks for sharing this important piece of advice with us!

    ~Lori

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    1. Thankyou for stopping by - I fall into this trap from time to time and its not something my husband likes me to do. it has become so common place these days, it has become acceptable to do it :(

      Blessings

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  8. Okay, I came here following the link posted by a friend on FB. I was expecting my toes to be stepped on, but I can't say as though they are. I have made comments about a person (celebrity or not) being nice looking, gorgeous, etc. However, it is on the same emotional level of "wow those trees are beautiful" or "gosh that is a beautiful baby". It is an appreciation for the beauty, not anything more. I do believe when you allow it to make you compare your husband to them or fantasize about them, it is already way too far. But, I can't find fault in recognizing something is nice to look at.

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    1. And I agree with you - making a comment about someone being attractive in passing is ok, but I know some women who have a "George Clooney" night and watch his movies and swoon all over him. That is something a little different, considering these women are all over 45. In fact it is a little weird to me!

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  9. So very true! It is so easy to think we have it put together in this area. I too have found myself doing this at times. Thank you for the idea of remembering Phil. 4:8 :) Stoppin by from FFF www.simplyhelpinghim.com :)

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    1. Thankyou for stopping by, lovely to meet you:)

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