Part 4: Support your husband

I thought I would write a series called "Keeper of the home for busy ladies", in particular for those, like me, who work outside the house either full-time or part-time.  However, we are all busy ladies and we all need as much encouragement as possible to get through the week in one piece.

Part one, two, three

Part 4: Supporting your husband

The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. (Prov 31:11)

Just because you and I are busy ladies doesn't mean we can neglect our husbands.  No matter what you do, you are his helpmate and that is a big responsibility and needs to be taken seriously. The Bible is very clear on this "And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him." (Genesis 2:18) I am not perfect when it comes to helping my husband, I stumble and grumble at times and wonder why he can't wash his dinner plate or pick up his sock, so the list below is as much a reminder to me as to anyone else who is a bit like me and can be a grumbler too!

There are many ways you can help your husband, some might appear to be small and insignificant -- others completely obvious, but everything is important in its own way. And considering the divorce rates these days, it would appear many wives don't see these things as either important or necessary in a modern marriage. This list isn't about "me", rather a list about helping my husband as the Lord has commanded every wife to do. So, how can we help -- by:

• being kind, gentle, caring, soft in words, loving, understanding, listening to him, considerate, patient, joyful, happy . . . 
• not being a nagging, demanding, controlling, angry, brawling, augmentative wife -- no husband wants to come home to a wife that treats him like this -- he is more likely to want to stay away from home
• not grumbling when he does something that you find annoying e.g. not washing his dinner plate!
• not complaining if he has to work back late, welcome him home with a big hug and smile and dinner ready
• be aware of how he is feeling -- tired, stressed, worn out after a busy day -- so you can react accordingly, he may have had a terrible day at work
• finding the time to sit and talk or sit and listen
• showing an interest in what he does at work, rather than talking non stop about your day
• working together towards common goals, rather than pulling in opposite directions
• reducing augments by not fighting over silly things -- it isn't about who is right or wrong
• finding out how you can help him to reduce his busy load e.g. by doing the finances
• appreciating his actions, efforts and work -- men like to be acknowledged when they do things
• respecting your husband's authority (his God-given position in the marriage)
• allowing him to create a God-centred marriage
• allowing your husband to take the leadership role in the marriage -- rather than being bossy, controlling or demanding -- remember the role of submission
• accommodate his likes into the house -- don't make it all about your tastes 
• keeping the house clean and tidy, make sure your husband can easily find things he uses often -- a busy man doesn't want to spend hours looking for things
• cooking healthy meals from scratch -- find out what he likes (mine likes a roast each week) -- after a busy day at work he will probably want a filling meal, not something thrown together
• spoiling him with special treats -- all men like to feel special
• making sure the bedroom is a special place for the two of you - spend some time making it look pretty
• living within your budget
• making sure you take care of yourself, dress the way he likes you to dress
• creating a home that is comfortable and happy -- inviting and calm -- a place he wants to be
• creating a harmonious home -- after a busy day, the last thing your husband wants to hear is screaming children and a yelling wife
• not talking behind his back about his faults, gossiping to others about your marriage
• lots of hugs and kisses -- he wants to feel wanted and needed -- he wants to feel special.

Pray for your husband, encourage him and respect him, each and every day. 

The rewards will be returned in abundances.

But most importantly

Love your husbands

Let the wife make her husband glad to come home and let him make her sorry to see him leave.

Martin Luther.